Thursday, August 6, 2009

Asking for what you need.....

This is one I struggle with. Even though I know asking for what you need is the sensible thing to do and is what keeps my life balanced, I seem to not be able to do it until I reach crisis point. Every now and then I will know that I am starting to get overwhelmed by things and that something has to give, but those old feelings and thoughts creep back in and prevent me from doing what I need to do, ie reach out for help. Primarily it is the feeling of guilt that gets me the most. The idea that I should always be able to cope with things, that its self indulgent to need time out, that I should just keep keeping on because everyone else seems to, that I have somehow failed when I lose my spark. I know that these ideas and thoughts are wrong and self destructive and that to listen to them only makes things worse. But boy once they start, they take over so quickly. I think I've also been slow to react to my current situation because I really have been very happy prior to the past week or two. So then to suddenly feel as though I'm falling in a hole just makes no sense and makes me feel pathetic for feeling so down when I have every reason to feel great. 
So anyway, today I went to my GP just to touch base with her about how I am feeling. She suggested that I need to give myself a break and take a step back from everything. It was amazing how much better I felt even after making the appointment to go and see her. Sometimes just being able to share how you're feeling with someone who won't judge you and who has a 'neutral' perspective can be really helpful. I was also reminded today of the importance of being proactive in regards to my mental health. Its very easy to just think, hey, its been a year now, I'm coping with things, everything is fine, I don't need any help. But perhaps what I do need to do is check in with a psychologist or counsellor every now and then so that I can stay on top of things (rather than just end up going to see someone once everything goes pear shaped).
My sister is reading a book at the moment that says turmoil in your life means you are about to learn a lesson or that the universe is trying to teach you something you need to know. I know that what I need to do now is sit still for long enough and take some time out so that my lesson can be revealed.  

1 comment:

  1. Talking to a therapist always helped me get a better perspective on things. I think for the same reason you mentioned - just talking it out.

    So true about the turmoil in life - now if I can only remember this when I'm bogged down and frustrated by it all!

    Glad you are feeling better!